autumn begins (with a recipe).

autumn begins

it’s an orange only october can explain

the roundness of everything is a beginning

and a beginning is hope.

love letters to begin the seasonal ministry,

the chorus bellows new hues of fat love from a clean slate

i sing to trust as the cold drops into a very familiar heat,

a temperature we have had every conversation with,

moist hugs, layered tank tops, the smell of sunscreen

hanging out on the hairline as I kiss you good night.

good-bye summer, 

hello fall.

falling in love with you all over again, believing in you for the first time,

each time, understanding yet another ochre yellow, deep grey green,

a brown that roots in deeper to a thought process hungering for the

slow down, 

finding me inside my peek a boo breath,

the vulnerability of varicose veins, 

meridians & school bus yellow lines

the road mapping out the direction to my dream.

oh and the fatness! the ok-ness of all the rotund love-

the acceptable obesity inside the celebration of a squash,

round, rind, bright & warm from its nap on the ground.

puy lentil soup with the last of the early girl tomatoes,

the turning on of everything inside –

all the lights, red, roasting the love, flesh down, skin up,

waiting for the heat to hit it’s number, I scan the wisdom list,

the to-do’s of my survival, my weekly vows of overwhelm and


messy me and the birth & death of everything that

continues to happen, 

the blood of it all.

hoping for some energy in the gas, more time in the fuel and all the

dreams of heroes, 

the freedom they exude, their firm triceps & hip


the stories in my hips are hiding tight like cross stitch


the answers 

come with tears. 

dying for love? possibly.

how can we really know anything?

the years continue to ground me in knowing less,

finding my way below the neck,

not thinking about anything,

feeling everything.

autumn begins: breasts to feed all of us inside kombochas,

pumpkins, butternuts, all the nourishing shapes we may

remember as warm love in our story somewhere.

a beginning is important to keep going,

it’s vital for survival & it’s happening now. 


turn oven on 400 convection* bake

place squash on casserole dish

(big enough for 2 halves of your squash)

pour oil all over squash

(2 second pour)

you can also massage it with the oil

put in the oven for 20 minutes

take out after 20 minutes & cut in half

(should be soft to cut into)

then place squash flesh down//skin up

put in for another 20 minutes

(you do


need to add any more oil here)

fork it to see if it's ready to your liking

texture, hardness, softness etc..

i usually keep seeds in as they add to flavor

you can scoop out after and toast

them with the last bit of heat in the oven

(*if you have convection//no worries if not)

you can leave this out on the stove top

with a beauty linen on top to cover it

in it's dish for warming later or noshing

as you go about your day!

you can mash it with earth balance or butter,

just serve as is, you can also put it in the


of a soup

creating another beauty love fest

enjoy beautiesxxxx